Somethings gotta give

Have you ever had one person that you wish would just disappear from your life? Someone who only causes problems and makes you question stuff that you wouldn't otherwise question? Well I do and she happens to be my boyfriends ex-girlfriend. I could understand for the first month or two that she wasn't over him since they were together for 3yrs..however, you would think that after they've been broken up for over 9 months now and he and I together for 7 that she would get the picture and go away but she hasn't. And to make it worse he's just been trying to ignore her "I love you's" and inappropriate comments hoping they will go away and they can still be friends. But they aren't going away and it's just making me more and more uncomfortable. What girl would be okay with their boyfriends ex-girlfriend not only still saying she loves him but also telling him stuff that is no long appropriate for her to tell him. I don't care that he was her best friend for 3 years. They aren't dating anymore and he is with me now so she needs to realize that she can't be saying stuff like that anymore. I feel like the biggest bitch ever for not wanting her around but I can't take her crap anymore. I can't take wondering if he hasn't told her to stop because he still loves her or because he wants her around in case we don't work out or if it really is just because he is ignoring her and hoping that it will stop. I love him more than anything and I would do anything for him. Hopefully he really does take care of it because I'm tired of fighting about her. After 7 months she shouldn't be a problem anymore, yet she still is. He is the one I wanna spend forever with, I just don't wanna have to deal with her for forever.

An update & a BIG secret

Okay so it's been awhile...

So lets begin with Daytona. Daytona was amazing, of course. But finding a job was IMPOSSIBLE! :( So I had to move back to Auburndale and therefor back in with my mom. Depressing...I know!

But Garrett and I are doing great! As of the 17th, which is Thursday, we will have been together for 5 months!(: I can't believe it! He is the most amazing guy I have ever dated. He's perfect for me! Goofy, sweet, a pain in the butt (but cute while doing so) and even better...he can cook and clean! Today (well technically yesterday) he made me Gluten-Free fried chicken and it was AH-MAZ-ING!!!! <3

But that's not all the good news I have....

As of a few weeks ago...Garrett and I have officially moved out together! We are now living with some friends and it is the most amazing thing. Having him there beside me every night and beside me when I wake has been beyond what I ever could have imagined. I knew I loved him when we were friends, but with each day that passes I fall more and more in love with him. He has truly stolen my heart! The is the first place that I am announcing this, as I'm not ready for the whole world to know just yet (until I get back from Missouri on the 29th.) But I had to tell someone because I am soooooo happy!

Even with all the bad going on in my life right now I can't help but smile. I am truly blessed to have a boyfriend who loves me, a few close and wonderful friends, and a family that supports me no matter what.

5 reasons why I hate being skinny

I recently bought a new pair of jeans online because they were having a really great sale. I got them in the mail and they were a little big (they are currently washing and drying to shrink). But it really annoyed me! I'm SO sick of being skinny and SO sick of trying* to gain weight. Here are 5 of the MANY reasons that I hate being so skinny.

1) I don't care what kind of food you make you're not going to fatten me up. Seriously...My senior year of high school I was put on weight gaining medicine because I only weighed 79Ibs. I had to take this medicine 30 minutes before every meal. I only gained 6Ibs in MORE THAN 6 months. I ate all the time. I carried a bag full of snacks because I was eating almost constantly! And yet I still only gained 6Ibs. So no you can't fatten me up.

2) Hearing my name connected with the words "anorexic" and "diet" and "not eating." Just because I only weigh 83Ibs doesn't not mean I have an eating disorder. People say all the time how wrong it is to judge bigger people and say they are just lazy because you never know when it's truly not their fault, due to healthy issues, etc. Well it works the same way with skinny people. Just because I'm not hungry 24/7 or I can't eat a cow during dinner doesn't mean that I'm sick. It just means that I will likely be hungry again in 20-30 minutes.

3) Finding bottoms that fit nice. Most people wouldn't think this would be a problem..but it is! Shorts are way to short (almost minds well not being wearing them) and jeans are usually to big in one or more areas. There are very few stores that even carry my size since I am a 00, and no I can not shop in the kids section..they don't have jeans that fit either. My size in the in-between...you know in-between kids and juniors. This means that when I find my size they are usually at least $30 and found at American eagle, Aeropostale, and Pacsun. **Not even Hollister carries below a 0.

4) People finding necessary to pick me up. I don't care if I'm small enough that you can pick me up I HATE IT! You don't need to pick me up to give me a hug. You don't need to pick me up to see if you can. And you DON'T need to pick me up to move me out of your way. You wouldn't try any of that with anyone else so don't do it to me. No it's not because I'm afraid of heights, in fact I love riding roller coasters, I just don't like being picked up. So people don't like hugs and some don't like their hair being touched..we are all allowed to have dislikes. People should learn to respect it!

5) Being cold easily. It may be 65 degrees outside and I may live in Florida...however, I am probably in a sweater and still shivering! I have to carry a sweater with me almost everywhere I can just in case I get cold. I don't care if most of the people in the state are down at the beach swimming, I'm freezing my butt off!

This may seem like just another rant. A list of complaints. In many ways that's what it is. Honestly, I am happy with my body most of the time. Everyone should feel beautiful no matter how they look; fat or skinny, tall or short, boobs or no boobs, etc. If you really don't like something about yourself then aim to change it. But if nothing you try works then maybe your body is just like that. Maybe that's the way you were meant to be! Embrace it!(:

The truth is....

Okay so i've been here in Daytona since friday evening. Let me start by saying it has been absolutely amazing to have my own room and bathroom. Classes have started and it's been kinda fun keeping up.

Now for the truth...i'm feeling kinda home sick... I'm so use to the routine that I have at home.

Monday- Classes & spending time with the Boyfriend.

Tuesday- Classes & the homeless outreach.

Wednesday- Classes & youth group.

Thursday- Classes & spending time with the boyfriend.

Friday-  Classes & spending time with the boyfriend.

Saturday- Spending time with the boyfriend && anyone else who wants to see me.

Sunday- Church.

Now I have classes and job searching... my schedule is feeling rather light and it's kinda driving me crazy. I miss Garrett. I miss being a youth leader. and I really miss my chruch family. But I like the freedom that I have here. It's driving me crazy...Who would've thought I would miss that place?!

Finals; Moving; and my Fairytale

Finals

So at the end of this past semester I took a leave of absence due to some family things that have been going on. I knew that I couldn't take my finals and pass them because I was to upset with everything else. Well part of taking a leave means that you eventually have to go back and finish up with the classes. And with the big move it will be impossible to finish up once I am in Daytona, so this week while I am working on my new classes, online of course, I will also have to go up to polk state to take my last couple of finals so that my fall semester is finally over. I am so nervous about my finals because one is in my math class and the other is in my Energy and Environment class. I can't wait to get them over!

My Fairytale <3

I can't remember the last time I was this happy. I have never felt more like I can be myself then I do when I'm with Garrett. I've spent the past five days with him and didn't feel a need to have my hair all fixed up or to be wearing makeup. Anyone who knows me knows that, that is a big deal since I almost never leave my house without makeup on. He says that he thinks i'm more beautiful without it. I think he's just saying that because he knows it makes me smile, but it works so I will let it slide!(:

The past five days have made me really realize how much i'm going to miss him when i'm in daytona. It was nice to be able to just lay around and talk to him. To have him right there by my side. But this time next week I will be in Daytona which will seem like a million miles away from him. I hate that I finally got the guy right as I was moving but I am so thankful that I finally get to call him mine. It feels so good to be able to say that I am dating my best friend.